Little things

Teach me to do your will for you are my God, Let your good spirit lead me on a level path. ~Psalm 143:10

“Each day holds a surprise. But only if we expect it can we see, hear, or feel it when it comes to us. Let’s not be afraid to receive each day’s surprise, whether it comes to us as sorrow or as joy. It will open a new place in our hearts, a place where we can welcome new friends and celebrate more fully our shared humanity.” ~From Bread for the Journey by Henri J.M. Nouwen

Changes may come slow but while I wait for change to come I can celebrate the surprises that each day holds. As I shift my sights from what I am not yet, I can celebrate new spaces and places in my heart. I can anticipate new friends and opportunities yet unseen. God’s promise to me is that He will never leave me or forsake me and that He is the same yesterday, today and forever. (Heb. 13:5,8) In the midst of changes I can hold onto the fact that God never changes.

Heavenly Father, as the year is still so new and with the unknown looming so large, I ask that You walk with me and help me see the little things along the way. Amen.

Let it be as You have said

Then Mary said, “I am the Lord’s servant. Let it be with me just as you have said.” Then the angel left her. ~Luke 1:38 (CEB)

“We know we are entirely dependent upon God, yet we forget and try to make our own provision for tomorrow or waste our energy in anxiety and fear that we will be forsaken when tomorrow comes. Mary was able to trust her life fully to the everlasting arms, sure that she would be upheld no matter what the future brought. ‘I am yours’. Help me to remember you provided for me as a helpless baby: you provide for me now and will provide for me through eternal ages. Help me to live as one life totally given to you.” ~From A guide to Prayer for All Who Seek God, Rueben P. Job

Heavenly Father, I know deep in my heart that You will provide all my needs, especially as I try to walk in obedience to your will. Guide my steps, strengthen my will, hold my hand as I try to walk this day for You, I am Yours. Amen.

The faith of my actions

I raise my eyes toward the mountains. Where will my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the maker of heaven and earth. God won’t let your foot slip. Your protector won’t fall asleep on the job. No! Israel’s protector never sleeps or rests! The LORD is your protector; the LORD is your shade right beside you. The sun won’t strike you during the day; neither will the moon at night. The LORD will protect you from all evil; God will protect your very life. The LORD will protect you on your journeys— whether going or coming— from now until forever from now. ~Psalm 121:1-8 (CEB)

There is no need to multiply examples of what is so patently and essential condition of the Christian walk. We are saved through faith – an unflagging, unwavering attachment to the person of Jesus Christ.

What is the depth and quality of your faith commitment? In the last analysis, faith is not a way of speaking or even of thinking; it is a way of living. Maurice Blondel said, ‘If you want to know what a person really believes. Don’t listen to what he says but watch what he does.’ Only the practice of faith can verify what we believe. Does faith permeate the whole of your life? Does it influence the way you read the newspaper? DO you have a divine sense of humor that sees through people and events into the unfolding plan of God? When things are turbulent on the surface of your life, do you retain a quiet calm, firmly fixed in ultimate reality? As Therese of Lisieux said, ‘Let nothing disturb you, let nothing frighten you. All things are passing. God alone remains.’ Does faith shape your Advent season this year?” ~From Reflections for Ragamuffins by Brennan Manning

Heavenly Father, as I wait, I pay attention, keeping my focus on You. Help me to see You in the little things so I can be bolstered for the big. Help me be ever watchful as I wait for Your plans to unfold. Hold my hand in the dark moments as I look to the light of this season. Amen.

Truly to trust

I know the plans I have in mind for you, declares the LORD; they are plans for peace, not disaster, to give you a future filled with hope. When you call me and come and pray to me, I will listen to you. When you search for me, yes, search for me with all your heart, you will find me. ~Jer 29:11-12

I have a dark secret. I worry about my children. Sometimes it is that deep dark crippling kind of worry where I find that the air has stopped flowing through my lungs. God has recently confronted me about these fears I have for my children.

I have embraced God’s promises and I know that He will take care of me and provide for me. I know deep in my heart that there is nothing that can separate me from God’s love and that He will take care of me. But do I have enough faith in God to think the same things for my children? Apparently not. I so worry about the hurts my children have sustained. I worry over the choices that they make. I can see the long term effects cut deep into them and how it could follow them through life.

God asked me one day. Do you not think that my promises are for your children too? Do you not think that I can use all of these things, their hurts and choices for their future? Do you not believe that I can use all these things for their good?

Despite the choices that my children make, despite the hurts they incur, God is holding them in His hands just like he has me in His hands. God has used all my pain and suffering and turned it into glory for Him. He will do the same for my children. That doesn’t absolve me of training them in the way they are to go but it does release me of the control and give control to God.

Heavenly Father, again I turn my children over to you. Protect their hearts, lead them in the way they are to go. I know that You will use all things to their ultimate good. I know that it will all be for Your glory. I trust that You love my children even more than I do. Amen.

 

Stop and remember

Jesus’ disciples had forgotten to bring any bread, so they had only one loaf with them in the boat. He gave them strict orders: “ Watch out and be on your guard for the yeast of the Pharisees as well as the yeast of Herod.” The disciples discussed this among themselves, “He said this because we have no bread.” Jesus knew what they were discussing and said, “ Why are you talking about the fact that you don’t have any bread? Don’t you grasp what has happened? Don’t you understand? Are your hearts so resistant to what God is doing? Don’t you have eyes? Why can’t you see? Don’t you have ears? Why can’t you hear? Don’t you remember? When I broke five loaves of bread for those five thousand people, how many baskets full of leftovers did you gather?”
They answered, “Twelve.” “ And when I broke seven loaves of bread for those four thousand people, how many baskets full of leftovers did you gather?”
They answered, “Seven.” Jesus said to them, “ And you still don’t understand?”
~ Mark 8:14-21 (CEB)

Sometimes I forget to stop and remember. I forget to slow down and understand. I forget to grasp the meaning that Jesus has for me. I forget to see. My eyes are not on Him.

When I don’t hold on to the truths that Jesus has shared with us I find anxiety and a restless heart robbing me of the peace that is promised when I place my trust in God. I stand there wondering why I am anxious… oh, I forgot to trust God again.

Life sometimes is too full. It holds so many opportunities with activities and distractions. When I find myself so busy is it any wonder that I grow anxious and lose my sense of peace and tranquility?

Heavenly Father, today I choose to remember that You alone are able to care for all that exists; I can trust my all from the smallest concern to the largest. Today I search out Your wisdom and love. I know that when I place my trust in You the gifts of peace, hope, calm and joy will be mine in abundance. Amen.

When fear comes knocking

But immediately Jesus spoke to them and said, “Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid.” ~ Matthew 14:27 (CEB)

Every season brings fresh reasons for fear. So each shift in my schedule, new venue I take on, new road I explore or change I go through is cause for my old enemy…  fear, to come knocking at my door.

Fear makes me doubt all that I know. It corrodes my confidence in God. Fear makes me second guess God and who I am in God. I catch spiritual amnesia forgetting what God has done for me and only seeing what He has done for others. Fear cripples and deafens my hearing until I can no longer hear God. Fear sucks the life out of my soul and dulls my faith.

Left unchecked fear will imprison my soul. Only prayer can release me. Jesus says, ““Do not fear. Only believe, and (you) will be saved.” (Luke 8:50) Only until fear is exposed can I be released from its hold on me. Faith counter acts fear and with faith I can hear Jesus say to me “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace.” (Luke 8:48)

Lord, Help me remember today that just because Fear comes knocking at my door does not mean that I have to open up the door much less invite it in for coffee. Keep fresh in my mind all the blessings you have bestowed on me. I thank You for Your loving grace. Amen.

My travel companion

..The Words that I Speak unto You, They are Spirit, and They are Life. ~John 6:63

Some days it seems that life is bigger than me.  My problems loom over me.  On days like this I have to remember to pray for God to keep my sight clear, that God will help me be able to know the truth in the situation and not to make things more than they are.

The problem with having a creative mind is that sometimes it gets stuck on overdrive. I have tucked in my heart for moments like these the verse from Philippians 4:7 that tells me that I can have peace despite my circumstances. Peace beyond my understanding.

I am so thankful that I don’t have to have all the answers to life’s problems. I am thankful for the strength to climb this mountain. With each muscle strain I know that I grow in strength and endurance and when I top this mountain I will survey all that has come and I will not fear the mountains still left to climb. Each peak will bring me close to the One who holds all my tomorrows, to the One who has my best intentions in mind, plans not for harm but for my good (Jeremiah 29:11).

Heavenly Father, I find myself climbing again. Even though I know that the stretch is good for my soul, may I feel You close by with each step that I climb. I do not want to climb this mountain by my strength alone for I know I would never make it. I welcome the growth but I fear the pain. Give me courage for the journey. Amen.

Signs and wonders

If you happen to think to yourself,” These nations are greater than we are; how can we possibly possess their land?” don’t be afraid of them! Remember, instead, what the LORD your God did to Pharaoh and all Egypt: the great trials that you saw with your own eyes, the signs and wonders, and the strong hand and outstretched arm the LORD your God used to rescue you. That’s what the LORD your God will do to any people you fear. The LORD your God will send terror on them until even the survivors and those hiding from you are destroyed. Don’t dread these nations because the LORD your God, the great and awesome God, is with you and among you. ~Deut.7:17-21 (CEB)

These versed jumped out at me three years ago after a particularly trying time. I was in the game of worrying about how I was going to fix everything and had myself convinced once again that I just needed to try-harder. I felt that God was telling me that even though I felt the problems I was dealing with were bigger than me I was not to be afraid of them. Instead I was to think back to times where God had done signs and wonders in my life. I was to think of the times He had rescued me from storms where his strong arm had plucked me out of the drowning waters. I was not to fear the trials I was going through. When I read these verses instead of seeing this as a story about the Israelites I saw myself in these verses and I knew God would fight my battle!

Despite the wonders God has done in my life, despite the signs He has sent me to convince me of His love for me I still find that I keep slipping back behind the mask of trying-hard. I am not meant to fight these battles alone. The story was never meant to be “By Jennifer’s mighty strength the battle was won.” No the story was always been, “See what the good Lord has done in Jennifer’s life? See the wonders! Look at these signs in her life and know that the Lord is good, that He will do for you what He has done for her.”

Heavenly Father, Thank You for always reminding me who is really winning the battles. I thank You that I don’t have to be strong enough, smart enough or patient enough. I thank You that You are. May Your love sustain me through this day through battles big and small. May I always give You the glory. Amen.

Change

There’s a season for everything and a time for every matter under the heavens: a time for giving birth and a time for dying, a time for planting and a time for uprooting what was planted, a time for killing and a time for healing, a time for tearing down and a time for building up, a time for crying and a time for laughing, a time for mourning and a time for dancing, a time for throwing stones and a time for gathering stones, a time for embracing and a time for avoiding embraces, a time for searching and a time for losing, a time for keeping and a time for throwing away, a time for tearing and a time for repairing, a time for keeping silent and a time for speaking,  a time for loving and a time for hating, a time for war and a time for peace. ~Ec c 3:1-8 (CEB)

Change, we have a love hate relationship. There are times I long for change, other times that I dread change.

Today will be our first day back to school. Starting school back is both a return to a certain structure and also a new beginning. As I contemplate this first day of our new school year I can’t help but wonder at the other changes on my horizon. I both anticipate and fear them at the same time. One part of me wants things to freeze in time; the other part of me is excited at the possibilities and long for them to hurry up.

But today I will concentrate on this season: the season for new books, and snuggles while reading, a time for teaching, a time for correcting. With this season I hope to remember to stay present in the moment not looking forward or back. The seasons, they are changing but here in this moment I will love and laugh and appreciate the now. I will remember to love and to smile. I will not let the fears of change threaten the excitement that newness holds.

Heavenly Father, I thank You for all seasons. Walk with us this day as we embark a new season of life. Guide our steps, help us remember to love and to laugh among the serious moments.

Freedom

We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life. ~Romans 6:2

When I say I long for freedom, freedom from what? Freedom from the illusion of control, that if I can just make sure things line-up “just so” nothing bad is going to happen. Freedom from the need to be right all the time, that sometimes I simple just don’t know the answers.  Freedom from the fears of serious things, like being lost, getting sick, the death of a loved one.  Freedom from irrational things like an organized house will bring peace and the feeling of order or that making everyone else happy can by some miracle make me happy.

When I say that “I can’t”, when I see that “God can”, when I take the action of letting Him handle all things, then I can experience freedom. Freedom from the try-hard life where I stay strong, put on a good front and think that I can handle all things my-self. When I trust, allowing my “self” to fall to the ground like a seed, that shell of my self-life can burst allowing the Healers life to burst forth.

New life brings freedom. God’s life allows me to experience a freedom I can never find on my own. I just have to allow myself to be buried with Jesus so that I may also be raised into a new life free of trying hard (and missing the mark).

Heavenly Father, I find myself trying so hard. I want to control everything and know all the answers. Please free my from my “self” so that I may have true life through You. Amen.

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