The one who touched my heart

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He said: I love you, LORD, my strength. The LORD is my solid rock, my fortress, my rescuer. My God is my rock— I take refuge in him!— he’s my shield, my salvation’s strength, my place of safety. Because he is praiseworthy,I cried out to the LORD, and I was saved from my enemies. Death’s cords were wrapped around me; rivers of wickedness terrified me. The cords of the grave surrounded me; death’s traps held me tight. In my distress I cried out to the LORD; I called to my God for help. God heard my voice from his temple; I called to him for help, and my call reached his ears. ~Psalm 18:1-6

“Becoming the Beloved is the great spiritual journey we have to make. Augustine’s words: ‘My soul is restless until it rests in you, O God,’ capture well this journey. I know that the fact that I am always searching for God, always struggling to discover the fullness of Love, always yearning for the complete truth, tells me that I have already been given a taste of God, of Love and Truth. I can only look for something that I have, to some degree, already found. How can I search for beauty and truth unless that beauty and truth are already known to me in the depth of my heart? It seems that all of us human beings have deep inner memories of the paradise that we have lost. Maybe the word ‘innocence’ is better than the word ‘paradise.’ We were innocent before we started feeling guilty; we were in the light before we entered into the darkness; we were at home before we started to search for a home. Deep in the recesses of our minds and hearts there lies hidden the treasure we seek. We know its preciousness, and we know that it holds the gift we most desire: a life stronger than death.” ~From Life of the Beloved by Henri J.M. Nouwen

I always believed that God touched me in my mother’s womb. Maybe He does us all. That would explain this longing we have deep inside us for something more, something that will complete us.  It is a comfort to know that I was made to long and search for a home that is mine. Maybe that is why I never felt that I was in a place where I completely belonged. I am meant to feel that I am only passing through. I am not meant to feel complete until I have found the One Who touched my heart. I am not meant to feel at home until I am home with Jesus.

Heavenly Father, I thank You for the Fullness of Your love. I thank You for touching my heart and calling to me from my mother’s womb. I thank you for calling to me, asking me just to seek… to seek the treasures that I would find if only I would start on that journey. I thank You for sending Your Son to show me the Way. Amen.  

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