A love that knows me

04 Aug 2014 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , ,

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If I could fly on the wings of dawn, stopping to rest only on the far side of the ocean— even there your hand would guide me; even there your strong hand would hold me tight! ~Psalm 139:9-10

Psalm 139 is my favorite of all Psalms. Verse 15 speaks of God knowing me while I was in the womb of my mother. He knows how I was put together and how I would develop once outside in the world. He saw my whole life before Him while I was still in the womb. He saw the heart aches I would endure, the strength I would gain and the love I would share.

God knows all my thoughts. He saw them before I ever had them. It does not surprise Him when I go astray. He completely surrounds me and keeps a hand on me. I am never alone. Even if I try to run away, He is still with me. There is no where I can hide from His presence. Even if I go down into the depths of despair He is there right beside me. Though darkness surrounds me and hides me from others it is not too dark for God to find me.

I can rely on God truly knowing me from the inside out. I cannot hide who I am from God. Though no one sees me for who I really am I can count on God truly knowing me… and still loving me. He knows how I feel about all the injustice in the world and when I don’t react in the way I should He gently reminds me that He once loved me when I was still astray.

God’s plans are beyond my understanding to numerous for me to comprehend. His love for me is humbling. If I came to the end of time I would still find myself in His hands.

Heavenly Father, look at my heart! Put me to the test! Know my anxious thoughts! Look to see if there is any idolatrous way in me, then lead me on the eternal path! Amen.  

Crossroads

01 Aug 2014 Leave a comment

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Don’t be afraid of them because the LORD your God is the one who will be fighting for you. ~Deut. 3:22 (CEB)

Do not be afraid. This is a phrase that is used throughout the Bible from Genesis to Revelations. It seems these words are said during times of great change or before a call of service. To Abraham when he was called to leave all he had ever known. To Moses who was called to lead his people out of Egypt; to Joshua who was called to lead the people out of the desert into the Promised Land.  Gideon.., Samuel.., Joseph…

Mary was called at a young age. The first words that were spoke to her were “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God.” (Luke 1:30) Before Mary hears anything else, God first wants Mary to hear that she is safe and that she has found approval from God. Her identity is a gift ~ “favored child of God”. These words are meant to strengthen and empower. To others Mary may seem an unlikely candidate for helping God save the world. She is young, poor, has no social standing and she is female.  Nothing about Mary declares that she can be who she is called to be apart from God.

Mary is treasured as the mother of Jesus. At one point she was just flesh and blood, just like me, no stronger or more intelligent. What elevates her was her simple offering of herself to God, knowing that she was inadequate for what God called her to do, but with a willing heart to go where He wanted her to go. She knew she was limited in what she could do apart from God. It is her willing heart that has set her apart.

I have a gift from God, His love for me. My identity is that I am a Beloved child of God. I am called to hear His voice among my crowded and distracted life. What is my call? My call is to hear and to be willing to go where He leads me. “Stand at the crossroads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way lies; and walk in it…” (Jer. 6:16) Nothing is more urgent in my life than the yearning to know and do God’s will. Every day I need to ask God, “Where are you leading me today?”

Every day is a crossroads Lord. Will I do your will, or will I follow my own desires? Lead me in the way I am to go.  I know that I am limited by what I can do on my own but with the Holy Spirit directing me I can know and do Your will. I thank You for Your love. Amen.

An awakening

31 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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When the crowd heard this, they were deeply troubled. They said to Peter and the other apostles, “Brothers, what should we do?” Peter replied, “Change your hearts and lives. Each of you must be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This promise is for you, your children, and for all who are far away—as many as the Lord our God invites.” ~Acts 2:37-39 (CEB)

Maybe it is hearing tv evangelists or street corner preachers that plant the idea in our heads that coming to Christ is a lightning bolt moment. While coming to Christ may seem like a once-in-a-lifetime experience it is really an ongoing journey within us. Conversion is a lifelong process of turning more and more fully toward God in all that we are, possess, and do. I can look back over my life and see earthshaking moments that seemed to shift my life more in line with Christ. But such moments are just part of the process not the end as I give myself over to the transforming power of God.

It took a long time for me to come to terms with the fact that change is not instantaneous. While conversion requires our decision and action, it takes time to change us into the image of Christ. I have also learned that it took time to develop my bad habits so it will also take time to undo the habits I have formed. Without the work of undoing the bad habits they will come back or new bad habits will take their place. (Matt 12:43-45)

Sometimes like Paul we need to begin our conversion by being knocked down. Once God got Paul’s attention, Paul began his conversion as he groped this way in blindness. With his sight gone, he was able to see with interior eyes. Paul’s conversion continued day after day as he began to give meaning to his hew name, Paul. His conversion continued till he end when he was on his way to Rome in chains.

I get a glimpse of Paul’s ongoing conversion when I read in Romans 7:15-21, “I don’t know what I’m doing, because I don’t do what I want to do. Instead, I do the thing that I hate. But if I’m doing the thing that I don’t want to do, I’m agreeing that the Law is right. But now I’m not the one doing it anymore. Instead, its sin that lives in me. I know that good doesn’t live in me—that is, in my body. The desire to do good is inside of me, but I can’t do it. I don’t do the good that I want to do, but I do the evil that I don’t want to do. But if I do the very thing that I don’t want to do, then I’m not the one doing it anymore. Instead, it is sin that lives in me that is doing it. So I find that, as a rule, when I want to do what is good, evil is right there with me.”

Conversion is an awakening of the spirit. Suddenly the world begins to make sense despite the absurdity, the injustice, the pain. Our vision is opened up enough to be able to absorb the contradictions and the collision of opposites. We go from being blind or short sighted to seeing with God’s eyes. The love of God dawns upon us and with it comes the most amazing promise and a new hope. What we cannot redeem, God can, and what we cannot erase God will.

Heavenly Father, I thank you for Your grace that saves me. I thank You for awakening my spirit and the transformation You allow in my life. I claim the strength You promise as I try to do Your will, one day at a time. Amen.

To move on

29 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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Compassion and deep forgiveness belong to my Lord, our God. ~Dan. 9:9

Part of being human is to hurt and be hurt.   Forgiving does not mean that I am denying my pain. Forgiveness means that I stopped pretending the hurt isn’t real. Only if I experience the sense of having been wronged and the impact of he action or attitude on my life is forgiveness possible. This is true whether or not harm was intended. Until I am honest about how I feel, forgiveness, and the ability to move forward cannot happen.

Loving, merciful and forgiving God, You have forgiven me much. May I forgive others as You have forgiven me, so that I as forgiven and reconciled can walk through this day with a glad and upright heart. Amen.

My plan for sucess

27 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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The human mind plans the way, but the Lord directs the steps. ~Proverbs 16:9 (CEB)

In my office, there are several sticky notes with, ideas, reminders, phone numbers, and notes from family. It seems that most days find me scrambling to use a sticky note. They are a really neat invention aren’t they? I often wonder how people come up with some of these ideas.

The idea for a sticky note itself came out of a failure.

A scientist at the 3M Company was working to try to improve the glue that they put on their tape so that it would stick better.  He came up with a new formula for glue, but the new glue didn’t stick very well at all.  It would stick at first, but then it was very easily pulled off.  He thought his new glue formula was a failure, but instead of throwing the formula in the trash, he decided to share it with others in the company and see if there might be some use for it.

A man named Art Fry started trying the new glue in different ways and finally he came up with the idea for the Post-It Note.  Now, Post-It Notes are the biggest money maker for the 3-M company. What started out to be a big failure for 3M turned out to be one of their greatest successes.

I am a planner. Sometimes things don’t go the way I intend for them to go. Even when I try my hardest it just doesn’t seem to work out. It would be so easy at these times to just throw my hands up and quit. When I remember at those times that there is Someone else who can take my failures and turn them into possibilities, I see things I never would have considered. When I turn failures over to God I often find that there are answers that can lead to a different success.

Proverbs 16:9 tells me that I may make the plans, but God will direct my steps. Often I know where I want to go, but I just can’t seem to get there. If I put my faith and trust in Jesus, He will direct my steps to where I need to be.

Heavenly Father, Thank You for sending Jesus to guide my steps, despite my planning. Soften my heart to go were You lead me. Help me to not get discouraged as I try to go about Your work this day. If I hit a wall, help me to wait patiently for You to show me the way around it. Amen.

Adrift

26 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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Noah was 600 years old when the floodwaters arrived on earth. Noah, his sons, his wife, and his sons’ wives with him entered the ark to escape the floodwaters. It rained upon the earth forty days and forty nights. The flood remained on the earth for forty days. The waters rose, lifted the ark, and it rode high above the earth. The waters rose and spread out over the earth. The ark floated on the surface of the waters. The waters rose even higher over the earth; they covered all of the highest mountains under the sky. The waters rose twenty- three feet high, covering the mountains. The waters rose over the earth for one hundred fifty days. After forty days, Noah opened the window of the ark that he had made. He sent out a raven, and it flew back and forth until the waters over the entire earth had dried up. Then he sent out a dove to see if the waters on all of the fertile land had subsided, but the dove found no place to set its foot. It returned to him in the ark since waters still covered the entire earth. Noah stretched out his hand, took it, and brought it back into the ark. He waited seven more days and sent the dove out from the ark again. The dove came back to him in the evening, grasping a torn olive leaf in its beak. Then Noah knew that the waters were subsiding from the earth. He waited seven more days and sent out the dove, but it didn’t come back to him again. In Noah’s six hundred first year, on the first day of the first month, the waters dried up from the earth. Noah removed the ark’s hatch and saw that the surface of the fertile land had dried up. In the second month, on the seventeenth day, the earth was dry.

God spoke to Noah, “Go out of the ark, you and your wife, your sons, and your sons’ wives with you. ~Gen. 7:6-7; 12; 17-20; 24; 8:6-16 (CEB)

There are times that I feel that I am adrift, not knowing where I am going or what I am meant to do, literally afloat at sea and no idea what to do.

Noah sat in his ark bobbing about on an ocean, not in control of where he was going, clueless as to when his ordeal would end. All he could do was to wait on God’s timing. Eventually, over the long and landless days, waiting turned to watching. Noah watched. Amid the waiting, hope and a sense of future possibility emerged.

Amid the uncertainty and suspense of not knowing, or the sheer tedium of things remaining the same, I can learn to keep my eyes wide open, scanning the horizon of my experience. Like Noah I may have to do this for a long time until at last some green sprig signals that there is land ahead. Signs may beckon through something as ordinary as a kind word, a hug from a child, the smile of a friend, or as subtle as an inner urge whispering, “This is where you need to go.” All of these are signs and promises of hope as I am tossed about on the sea of unknowing.

Wondrous God, Your signs and promises are the rock on which my hope is built and my shelter in times of unknowing. May the memory of Your faithfulness sustain my faithfulness in you. Let me not tire of praising You, no matter how difficult the wait may seem. Amen. 

In my father’s footsteps

25 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will certainly not pass away. ~Matt. 24:35

As a child, I often had to scurry to keep up with my father’s pace. Even as I became full grown it remained a challenge to match my father’s fast stride. Recently, my father and I were in a store together looking for some items. All of a sudden it hit me, I was slowing my steps to match my walk with his. This realization took my breath away. When did his happen?

As a child, I raced to match my father’s tempo in life. I probably get my drive and determination from him. But in this slower pace I have noticed other things my father does. He is quick to say a kind word to people he meets. Quick to go out of his way to lend a hand. He patiently sits with those in pain. He loves deeply those God has placed in his path. There is much I try to measure in my life to my dad’s that will never change. He will always be an example that I will try to live up to.

The cycle of life is hard to live through sometimes. That realization that the way things have always been are now shifting. Children grow up and leave the home. Parents age and slowdown. But there is one constant in all of this, God.

I can’t help but wonder what legacy I am leaving my own children. As they follow in my footsteps, do they see my confidence in God that He is always with me? Do they see patience and love in my actions to others? Will they see by my example that the only constant we have in life is God?

Heavenly Father, You are, You were, and You always will be. Help me not to fear the future or feel sadness in life’s cycles. Help me to see Your constant Presence through it all. Amen.

Shelter in the desert

24 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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Jacob left Beer- sheba and set out for Haran. He reached a certain place and spent the night there. When the sun had set, he took one of the stones at that place and put it near his head. Then he lay down there. He dreamed and saw a raised staircase, its foundation on earth and its top touching the sky, and God’s messengers were ascending and descending on it. Suddenly the LORD was standing on it and saying, “I am the LORD, the God of your father Abraham and the God of Isaac. I will give you and your descendants the land on which you are lying. Your descendants will become like the dust of the earth; you will spread out to the west, east, north, and south. Every family of earth will be blessed because of you and your descendants. I am with you now, I will protect you everywhere you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done everything that I have promised you.” ~Gen. 28:10-15

Jacob had tricked his brother Esau out of his inheritance and his blessing. Esau was so angry at Jacob that Jacob feared for his very life. So he ran away. This scripture starts with Jacob running for his life; he is scared, tired, lonely, and feeling guilty for what he has done. He knows that he has really messed things up.

When night came, Jacob was tired so he just laid down on the ground using a rock as a pillow. When he fell asleep he had a dream. In his dream he saw a ladder reaching from the earth all the way to heaven. Angels were ascending and descending the ladder. At the top of this ladder was God.

God reached out to Jacob through this dream. I think God spoke to Jacob in his dream because Jacob knew he had messed up pretty badly, he had little hope for his future and he was scared for his safety. He was in need of some good news.

In the dream God told Jacob a few things:
-God told Jacob that the land Jacob was laying on was for him and for his children (hope).
-God told Jacob that his children and his children’s children and his children’s, children’s children would spread all over the earth and all the families of the earth will be blessed through them (future).
-And this is my favorite part—God said these words to Jacob, “know that I am with you and will keep you wherever you go” (security).

I make many mistakes living in this world. There are times I wonder how God could ever forgive me. But this story reminds me that God does love me even at my worst. Even more, God keeps his promises. They are not dependent on my actions. And despite the mistakes I make God can still use me.

O Lord, You alone are my hope, my future and my security. I place my trust in You. You are my rock of refuge where I can always escape. My praise is always about You. Amen.

Getting back up

23 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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God is our refuge and strength, a help always near in times of great trouble. That’s why we won’t be afraid when the world falls apart, when the mountains crumble into the center of the sea, when its waters roar and rage, when the mountains shake because of its surging waves. ~Psalm 46:1-3 (CEB)

Life’s journey is not easy. It is through my struggles that I can be conformed to the image of Christ. This process of being reshaped in Christ’s image takes time. Only through the Holy Spirit can this process happen. After I have turned my heart to God, the work of bringing my life in line with His begins. Through maturity I gain knowledge, wisdom and love. My growth with the help of the Holy Spirit can be marked by an up and down movement, forward and backward, and at times even circular!

The journey is never in a straight path free of bumps and strains. Throughout the process however, God never wavers and undergirds me with His grace. This gives us the hope, courage and perseverance for the journey.

It’s a journey. I take a few steps, I might fall down. I get up, take another step, and fall down again. And then I get up. . . As someone once observed, “It is not the falling in the water that drowns, but the staying there.”

Heavenly Father, Thank You for ever being my strength, my comfort and my help in times of need. Because You walk with me this day, I will not be afraid, even if the mountains crumble and the storms rage. You are my hope and my peace. Amen.

Love beyond all limits

20 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

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Therefore, imitate God like dearly loved children. Live your life with love, following the example of Christ, who loved us and gave himself for us. He was a sacrificial offering that~ smelled sweet to God. ~Eph 5:1-2 (CEB)Even if you have not grown up in church I feel confident that you have heard that God loves us. Maybe you have heard of God’s love through the simple children’s song, “Jesus loves me”. In church the concept of God’s love is taught but not necessarily known. It takes life experiences to begin to understand what God’s love means in our heart. But this journey towards understanding just how big, how wide how deep how great God’s love really is (Eph 3:18-19), begins with misunderstanding just what love means

For many reasons we find ourselves misunderstanding God’s love. That it is absolute and unlimited for each one of us. The reasons that it is difficult for us to receive, trust or see His love are as numerous as there are people in the world. The relationships we have with others impact us and affect our views on what love means. How we interact in relationships can be reflected in how we interact and relate to God. Somewhere along the way we may be taught that love is based on performance, control, comes with conditions… When we take our first step on our journey of who we really are in Christ, we can begin to understand the concept of God’s perfect love for us just as we are right now.

It wasn’t until after the birth of my daughter, standing over her crib watching her sleep that I began to get a taste of what God’s love is for us. I also began to understand just how human I really was and that I could never love her enough. Matthew 7:11 says ” If you who are evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask him.” If  I with all my faults, love my children and want so much for them can I not begin to take to heart the love God has for me? After being a mom for 17 years, I am only beginning to scratch the surface of this kind of love.

Our journey towards grasping the concept of God’s love begins with this verse in Romans 8:38-39, ” But in all these things we win a sweeping victory through the one who loved us. I’m convinced that nothing can separate us from God’s love in Christ Jesus our Lord: not death or life, not angels or rulers, not present things or future things, not powers or height or depth, or any other thing that is created”. God’s love for us knows NO limits.

Sometimes understanding is beyond our reach when life has caused deep wounds, Henri Nouwen in his book, The Wounded Healer, has this to say, ” How can someone ever trust in the existence of an unconditional divine love when most, if not all, of what he or she has experienced is the opposite of love -fear, hatred, violence, and abuse? They are not condemned to be victims! There remains within them, hidden as it may seem, the possibility to choose love. Many people who have suffered the most horrendous rejections and been subject to the most cruel torture are able to choose love. By choosing love they become witnesses not only to enormous human resiliency but also to the divine love that transcends all human loves. Those who choose, even on a small scale, to love in the midst of hatred and fear are the people who offer true hope to our world.”

I walk a narrow path of hope in the midst of a world that has only hatred and fear to share. I look not to the world to define what love means. I look to the Source that is love. Sometimes the people in my life are here to show me what love is not. Other times I am blessed with insights of what love truly can be.

Heavenly Father I thank you this day for Your love that has no limits. I thank You for those people You have placed in my life to love and to love me. May I be an example of love to all I meet this day. Amen.

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