Sighs too deep for words

28 Aug 2014 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , ,

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words. And God, who searches the heart, knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. ~Rom 8: 26-27 (NRSV)

Have you ever found yourself in a place where words just seem too insignificant for what you are feeling?

When I know I should pray, but the words won’t come, when I want to cry out to God but all that surfaces is this welling up from inside of me, I am confident that God even knows these prayers. The comfort I receive in my darkest hours is knowing that even though I may not know how to pray, the Spirit- God’s Spirit will pray for me. In my weakness; God himself prays for me.

On the days when fear raises its ugly head, when life doesn’t go the way I planned, when I think I am alone in my struggles, I take a deep *sigh* and I am reminded that God’s Spirit is deep within me sighing too. Saying what I can’t. In my sigh I lift up my eyes and say “You know my heart God. You know when I lie down and when I get up. You know that I don’t have strength for this day.” My hands are not lifted because I give up. My hands are lifted because I surrender to the One who knows all my tomorrows and has my best interest in mind.

Romans 8:24-25 says, “We were saved in hope. If we see what we hope for, that isn’t hope. Who hopes for what they already see? But if we hope for what we don’t see, we wait for it with patience.” Because of my hope I looked upward. My hope saves me. I hope for what isn’t right now. I hope for the possibilities of what might be. Against all hope I wait patiently… and when I can’t hope anymore the Spirit prays for me.

When I am weak I am strong because it is God’s strength that works in me (2 Cor. 12:10). When I don’t have the strength or enough hope to lift up a prayer His Spirit prays my prayer.

So I sigh again Lord. Every breath I breathe is from You. Your breath flows through me. You sustain me. You shield me. You love me like no one else can. I know You hold me in Your hands. My hope is in You. Amen. 

Who’s in the driver seat

17 Jul 2014 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , , ,

I know the plans I have in mind for you, declares the LORD; they are plans for peace, not disaster, to give you a future filled with hope. When you call me and come and pray to me, I will listen to you. When you search for me, yes, search for me with all your heart, you will find me.~Jer 29:11-13 (CEB)While I was using the navigation app on my phone I missed an important turn. Right after I took  a right I didn’t realize my phone was telling me to stay right for another turn. When I realized what the app wanted me to do, it was too late to make the turn. My phone could have said, “Well that’s it. Since you are too stupid to understand what I am telling you, I am going to leave you to figure out what you need to do next.” No, my phone didn’t ridicule me or berate me for being confused. It simple recalculated the road to adjust to where I was at the  moment, leading me to other roads that ultimately got me to my intended destination.

I have seen the Holy Spirit working in my life in the same way. When I think I know the path that I am supposed to be on but then realize that I am lost and confused, I do not find myself abandoned by the Holy Spirit. No. I cannot mess up God’s plan for my life. When I take a wrong path the Holy Spirit simply  recalculates  to adjust to where I am at the moment, continuing to lead me in the way I need to go. Now I could be upset with the detour I have taken or I can sit back and calmly realize that God is still in control of my life. His plan for me includes those times that I take back over the direction I am headed.

There are no words to match the feelings that well up inside me when I realize that there is NOTHING I can do to mess up my God-given-destiny. Despite myself, God will get me where He plans for me to be. That’s kinda humbling.

Father  in heaven, thank You for never leaving me where I am at but taking me on to what You have planned for me. Amen.

Betrayed

09 Jun 2014 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , ,

It’s not an enemy that is insulting me— I could handle that. It’s not someone who hates me who is exalted over me— I could hide from them. No. It’s you, my equal, my close companion, my good friend! ~Psalm 55:12-13 (CEB)

There is nothing worse in the world than to be betrayed by a friend. A friend, a close friend is someone you trust, someone you expect to be there for you in good times and bad. No one can hurt you more than a dear friend. When you have been betrayed by a friend the hurt goes so deep that you feel like you could never trust anyone ever again. You feel so alone with your feelings of hurt and betrayal. No one could ever know what you are going through.

But you are not alone. Jesus was sold out by a kiss. His betrayal led him to the cross. Peter, one of his closest friends, denied him not just once but three times. All the disciples fled in fear. Jesus was left alone. In the moment he needed a friend the most he found himself without even the dearest friends. They were all gone.

I don’t think I have ever been in a place where I have felt such complete abandonment. I have felt the sting of losing a friend that I thought I could trust but once the pain subsided some I realize that I was not as alone as I thought. But for Jesus there was no one. The hardest thing for me about this story of betrayal and abandonment is that Jesus foreknew what was to come. He did not walk into this situation blindly. He chose to die on the cross to save me even when those dearest to him had left him to fend for himself. If I had been in his shoes I imagine I would have said well if even my closest friends can’t appreciate what I am about to do for the world then why bother! But thankfully I am not the Messiah.

It brings great comfort to me when I realize that there is nothing in the world that Jesus hasn’t been through. If I need an understanding ear he is the best choice. Jesus will never abandon me. Romans 8: 38-39 says, “I’m convinced that nothing can separate us from God’s love in Christ Jesus our Lord: not death or life, not angels or rulers, not present things or future things, not powers or height or depth, or any other thing that is created.” There is NOTHING that can separate me from the love of God. Even though I might find myself alone, Jesus will always be with me. The Bible tells me so.

I am thankful that I have a friend in You Jesus. There is nothing that I go through that You have not also been through as well. I know I can trust You and turn to You for guidance in all I do this day. Amen

Endurance

12 Jan 2014 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , , ,

My brothers and sisters, think of the various tests you encounter as occasions for joy. After all, you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. Let this endurance complete its work so that you may be fully mature, complete, and lacking in nothing. But anyone who needs wisdom should ask God, whose very nature is to give to everyone without a second thought, without keeping score. Wisdom will certainly be given to those who ask. Whoever asks shouldn’t hesitate. They should ask in faith, without doubting. Whoever doubts is like the surf of the sea, tossed and turned by the wind. People like that should never imagine that they will receive anything from the Lord. They are double-minded, unstable in all their ways. ~James 1:2-8 (CEB)

“Spiritual discernment has always come hard for me, so hard that I once concluded that I could not do it. After all, discernment is a spiritual gift- and I obviously had not been given gift. I felt that I could do nothing but shrug and trudge on. And trudge I did for long periods of my life. In one instance I spent almost a year trying to discern God’s will on am important matter that would affect the rest of my life. During that year I felt the intense frustration of being dragged across the cutting edge of indecision. That was a long time to be in turmoil. It was tough. My only saving grace was that I would not commit to a decision until I felt that I had clear knowledge of God’s will. I now realize that my reluctance to act was an important part of the discernment at work in me. But not knowing that at the times made it a year of anguish…

God wants everyone to know God’s will. God doesn’t withhold grace, play games, or tease us to test our faithfulness or our worthiness to be trusted with divine insight. I am convinced that God is far more prone to human revelation that I am to divine encounter. God’s will is that you and I, everyone, and our faith communities should discern and act upon God’s will.” ~From Yearning to Know God’s Will by Danny E. Morris

Heavenly Father, Help me to not be tossed and turned by doubt. Help me to have clear knowledge of your will. Give me courage to encounter Your testing so that I may gain endurance. For I know with endurance I will become fully mature, complete and lacking in nothing. Amen.

Little things

08 Jan 2014 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , ,

Teach me to do your will for you are my God, Let your good spirit lead me on a level path. ~Psalm 143:10

“Each day holds a surprise. But only if we expect it can we see, hear, or feel it when it comes to us. Let’s not be afraid to receive each day’s surprise, whether it comes to us as sorrow or as joy. It will open a new place in our hearts, a place where we can welcome new friends and celebrate more fully our shared humanity.” ~From Bread for the Journey by Henri J.M. Nouwen

Changes may come slow but while I wait for change to come I can celebrate the surprises that each day holds. As I shift my sights from what I am not yet, I can celebrate new spaces and places in my heart. I can anticipate new friends and opportunities yet unseen. God’s promise to me is that He will never leave me or forsake me and that He is the same yesterday, today and forever. (Heb. 13:5,8) In the midst of changes I can hold onto the fact that God never changes.

Heavenly Father, as the year is still so new and with the unknown looming so large, I ask that You walk with me and help me see the little things along the way. Amen.

Keeping the peace in our hearts

20 Aug 2013 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , ,

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. ~John 16:33

Whatever we do in the Name of Jesus, we must always keep the peace of Jesus in our hearts.  When Jesus sends his disciples out to preach the Gospel, he says:  “Whatever town or village you go into, seek out someone worthy and stay with him until you leave.  As you enter his house, salute it, and if the house deserves it, may your peace come upon it; if it does not, may your peace come back to you”  (Matthew 10:11-13).

The great temptation is to let people take our peace away.  This happens whenever we become angry, hostile, bitter, spiteful, manipulative, or vengeful when others do not respond favorably to the good news we bring to them.” ~From Bread for the Journey, by Henri J. M. Nouwen

Grant my heart peace this day O Lord. Help me to see with Your eyes and to Hear with Your ears. Help me to see beyond the present trials to the glory beyond. Amen.

Are you catchin’ anything?

04 May 2013 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , ,

When they finished eating, Jesus asked Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”

Simon replied, “Yes, Lord, you know I love you.”

Jesus said to him, “Feed my lambs.” Jesus asked a second time, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

Simon replied, “Yes, Lord, you know I love you.”

Jesus said to him, “Take care of my sheep.” He asked a third time, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

Peter was sad that Jesus asked him a third time, “Do you love me?” He replied, “Lord, you know everything; you know I love you.”

Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep. I assure you that when you were younger you tied your own belt and walked around wherever you wanted. When you grow old, you will stretch out your hands and another will tie your belt and lead you where you don’t want to go.” He said this to show the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. After saying this, Jesus said to Peter, “Follow me.” ~John 21:15-19 (CEB)

“Thinking all is lost after the crucifixion, some of the disciples go fishing on the Sea of Tiberius- a dismal, depressing fishing expedition. Hot, naked, and exhausted, the disciples try valiantly to return to the way things were before they met Jesus. Suddenly a voice from the shore (big rock thrown here): ‘Catchin’ anything?’ ‘Nah,’ they shout back, more depressed then ever. ‘Then try the other side of the boat!’ the voice yells again. Peter stands up to see who this wise guy is. Wait no, it can’t be- but, yes, it is: the Lord! Suddenly Peter can’t move fast enough. He leaps into the water, and swims to shore, leaving the others to haul in a miraculous catch. His faith grows three sizes in a matter of minutes. The boundaries of what he thinks God can do explode, and his love and gratitude for what God is doing in Jesus Christ, the Lord of Life, is simply too large to fit in the boat anymore.” ~From The Godbearing Life by Kendal Creasy Dean and Ron Foster

I sometimes feel when things aren’t moving the way I think they should go or as fast as I would like it that I lose my sense of direction. Sometimes, Jesus has to ask me, “Are you catchin’ anything?” in order to remind me that I might just be fishing off the wrong side of the boat.

Thank You Heavenly Father, for the redirection of my vision when I become distracted with living. Thank You for the miracles you bring into my life to remind me just what I should be fishing for. Amen.

Gone fishing

03 May 2013 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

So then let’s also run the race that is laid out in front of us, since we have such a great cloud of witnesses surrounding us. Let’s throw off any extra baggage, get rid of the sin that trips us up, and fix our eyes on Jesus, faith’s pioneer and perfecter. He endured the cross, ignoring the shame, for the sake of the joy that was laid out in front of him, and sat down at the right side of God’s throne. ~Hebrews 12:1-2 (CEB)

“Human beings are ambivalent toward holiness. We are drawn toward those qualities exemplified by a St. Francis or by a Mother Teresa, or by communities who witness to the gospel under severe persecution. Yet we find such qualities disturbing, too far removed from the way we must live our daily lives. Something deep within our existence create a restlessness for God, yet we live and move and work in a culture of technology. Efficiency, and the tyranny of the literal. The hunger for holiness coexists uneasily with the practical atheism of our way of life. Still, the deepest language of the Christian biblical tradition claims that the created world itself already reflects the goodness and recreation. The time and place where these tensions intersect is the gathered church at worship.” ~From “Sanctifying Time, Place and People” by Don E. Saliers in The Weavings Reader

Heavenly Father, may You not find me oblivious this day to the things You would have me to do. Direct my focus towards You. May each step I take be in line with Your will for my life. Amen.

Realignment

02 May 2013 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

“I called out to the LORD in my distress, and he answered me. From the belly of the underworld I cried out for help; you have heard my voice. ~Jon. 2:2 (CEB)

“It is, I believe, this discovery of our own radical powerlessness for good and potential for evil that causes us to be identified with the crucified Christ. The details vary for each individual: they may concern the governance of one’s own life, bringing up one’s family or one’s work for the Church. Instead of being filled with the power of the Spirit we find ourselves empty and resourceless, victims of our own weakness and quiet possible, the objects of others’ disapproval. Generally one’s first solution is to work harder, trying to demonstrate competence. The situation deteriorates further. What we need to do is take the powerlessness as a basic premise, and use this as a fulcrum to lift our hearts in prayer toward God.” ~From Toward God by Michael Casey

Life happens. My best laid plans, my best organizational skills sometimes fail me and I find myself in over my head. I was prepared but then life knocked my feet out from underneath me…  one of “those days I tried my best and yet failed.” Now I find myself just trying to pick up the pieces and get through the day.

Today Lord, I find myself out of energy. I turn to You in this moment, to the Source of my energy. Fill me up again Lord so that I may continue to run the course. Amen.

Questions and questing

04 Mar 2013 Leave a comment

by jennifermcintyreblog in Devotions Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

And all of us, with unveiled faces, seeing the glory of the Lord as though reflected in a mirror, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another; for this comes from the Lord, the Spirit ~2 Corinthians 3:18 (NRSV)

“Our questions can serve us well in a time such as this, a time of grave uncertainty, of soaring potential, of fragile yet resilient hope. Our questions and questing are crucial, because they can help us live into the answer of the future. I am certain of one thing: the love that is God is at the heart of the answer, just as it is at the heart of each moment- past, present, and future. Faith today, tomorrow, and always seeks to live, to love, and to be loved fully. It seeks the Holy and waits (though not always patiently) to be found; it nurtures and activates wisdom and compassion. It chooses to embrace hope and to be embraced by hope, even when overwhelmed by despair; it seeks life even in the face of death. We act in faith, knowing that we see only dimly. But living in faith, we act anyway, choosing and doing the best we can. We act and live in confidence that someday we will see face to face, that we will live into the answers. For God’s grace embraces our questions as well as our answers and our blindness as well as our vision, just as the sun shines steadily through the night, waiting to illumine the sky at dawn.” ~From Wrestling till Dawn by Jean M. Blomquist

I cannot run from the questions that haunt my heart. I must not assume that God criticizes me for even having questions. It is when I wrestle with the questions that I come to find the answers. I must remember that God is big enough to handle all my questions. He knows that it is in my questions that the veil begins to life. Through my questions I begin to be transformed.

Heavenly Father, Thank You for Your patience in all the questions I have. Thank You for pointing me in the right direction to discover the answers. Help me to see more clearly and to have the patience to wait out the answers. Amen.

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